@Omrrc I've struggled with this as well for a long time, luckily in my case, working out after the kids went to bed worked out fine. They would go around 7:30ish, the gym was a 2-minute drive from the house I worked out and by the time I'd come back my wife would still be awake and we could spend some time watching tv or just talking before we would both go to bed. Now I have a different schedule, I leave the house at 4 am and get back by 11 Am, and the girls are at granma's so I can get my workout in before everyone gets back in the afternoon. Also, I would say that there is nothing wrong to put yourself first sometimes. You need to take care of yourself before taking care of others. They can get the best of you if you are not at your best.