Do better

For the past few nights, or maybe weeks, I really haven’t been sleeping well enough.

I am yet to pinpoint the true reason for it. Occasionally, I have one of the kids to blame, but that is not always the case. Too much in my mind? Stress? Also find myself doom-scrolling Twitter and Instagram quite a lot. Looking for what? I don’t know. I often wonder if I should quit these social media platforms — again — just to see if that makes a difference. It is not necessarily because I dislike them or inset-any-other-social-media-issue-here. It is more about how much time I consume while when I should just go to sleep. I have no control, I just scroll, especially when I feel like I am not tired enough yet. Then, 2 hours later, I’m still scrolling.

That’s one thing. Second, I have skipped the gym Monday and Tuesday of this week so far, and the entire last week. There always a suitable excuse, and mostly because I didn’t sleep the night before, and I am tired. I am back at the mentality of, eh, don’t feel like it, I’m not going. Not even the attempt of dragging myself to the gym. I am kind of hating myself a bit, well, not hate, more like disappointed. I feel irresponsible and undisciplined and should be doing better.

Gabz @Gabz